Considering the spate of musician deaths in the last couple of years, it was only a matter of time before it claimed one I considered my own.
I was a late comer to the Linkin Park bandwagon; it wasn't until "Faint" from their 2003 album Meteora
that I sat up and paid attention. I still remember my reaction to hearing that song for the first time, because hearing it now, fourteen years later, I have the same reaction.
IDK. It just got into my blood.
I've often said that music is the lifeblood of my creativity, and never has that been so apt as to when it came to LP. Their songs are all over my stories; hell, in my Daria
universe, Mystik Spiral basically takes LP's career path. Both of my Daria
stories feature LP songs; all of the fic I've written for that series (quite a bit of it unpublished) was originally named after one of their songs.
Early LP was the perfect fit for Inuyasha
's anger and frustration with the world, and I had, once upon a time, planned to do a collection of stories based off of songs from Meteora
. As the band's sound evolved, so did their ability to spark my inspiration. The last album I purchased was 2010's A Thousand Suns
, the making of which more or less served to cement my 1000% crush on Mike Shinoda.
Learning that Chester is gone still doesn't feel real. I didn't believe it until I saw Mike's statement on Twitter, and I was absolutely crushed, especially for him. In all of their making of clips, you can see that they had a pretty special bond as the creative forces of the group. Chester was the soul of the band, and now that he's gone...
IDK. I don't know what they're going to do, how they're going to react, what's going to happen to their seventeen years of bandom togetherness. How can LP exist without their charismatic frontman? I found them late, but they have meant the world to me, even if I'm perpetually 5 years behind the times. I would listen to Chester sing the damned phone book - his talent was that
He was so young. SO young. I hope that he didn't take his own life, or that if he did, it was accidental, like Scott Weiland's sudden overdose. I have no expectation that this will bear out, but I just can't stand the thought of someone like him, who was so warm and positive and just really fucking amazing, in that sort of anguish and pain. He had a really difficult childhood, one that haunted him for the better part of his life, but he'd turned the corner over the last couple of years. The cycle was supposed to end with him, not end him
My heart goes out to his family and his bandmates and to my fellow fans, a lot of whom relied on LP's music to bring them out of their own dark places. It was nice to be on social media when the news broke, to see the outpouring of grief and love alongside the slack-jawed astonishment. It helped, knowing I wasn't the only one whose day came to a sudden, abrupt halt, who sat there numb and fighting back tears. I read the responses to Mike's tweet confirming the death and almost came to tears again.
I hope Chester is at peace now. There will never be another one like him.